Friday, March 13, 2009

Snot-Nosed Brat

I'm renaming myself.

The past 5 days I have been nothing but a weepy, sickly, sleepy, grumpy snot-faced jerkoff. I HATE being sick, and I make sure EVERYONE knows it.

I am stuck at work today, wiping my nose over and over with bargain Kleenex I bought at Wal-Mart while thinking "45 CENTS for KLEENEX?!?!? I am a penny-pinching MACHINE!" Now I want to shoot myself, as my nose is rubbed RAW. I can't run to the store to get more cuz my husband has the car for the lunch hour, and I am pretty sure I am bleeding by now.

Oh, yeah, and I forgot I need to try to rally for the big St. Patties Day shindig tomorrow, where I start drinking at 9AM. I doubt, this time, that I will try to monitor how much alcohol I drink; I'll just get hammered right off the chalk, and maybe I might feel better. Maybe the green stain above my upper lip will just get mistaken for green beer instead of my drunken snot trail.

Hot.

Wanna make out?

1 comments:

Meta Megan said...

You need puffs plus with lotion. Anything less than that is a nightmare! (Believe me, I have wiped a lot of noses in the last two weeks)